Last updated December 20th 2015
(Photo Credit: Justin Sullivan/Hetty/JTA)
By The Daily Freier Staff
Last Updated 12/18/2015 at 1:30 PM
Herzliya Pituach: Start-Up Nation has done it again, as Google unveiled the new “Israel Edition” of its famed Google Glass franchise. Google Israel spokesperson Dalit K. addressed an excited tech media at the company’s Herzliya campus.
“With our new Israel Edition of Google Glass, the absurd things that happen to a user here are received as images, broken down into data packages, reconfigured, and received by the user’s eyes as normal every day activity. But we want to test it, so we will now drive the Google Bus around Greater Tel Aviv giving the Israeli public a chance to experience “Google Israel Glasses” first hand.” The Daily Freier was lucky enough to tag along on this historic ride through Tel Aviv with the Google Bus.
“OMG these are Amazing!!!” shared recent Olah Rachel C. “So right now I’m driving into the Namal Port Shopping Outlet and a heavyset 50-year-old shirtless guy holding a clipboard is now directing traffic. So I am just going to stop, slip on my Google Israel glasses, wait for the man to wave me on, and keep driving! Problem solved! Thank you, random shirtless guy! And thank YOU, Google Glass- Israeli Edition! Hey…. can I borrow these for a few minutes? I need to go online and check Secret Tel Aviv!”
The Google Bus then stopped at Tel Aviv Savidor Central Train Station and spoke with commuter Yonatan S. while he debited his “Rav-Kav” transit pass at a kiosk. “So the money I load for the trains on my Rav-Kav can’t be used for buses in Tel Aviv….which can’t be used for buses in Jerusalem…which can’t be used for inter-city buses. Oh and you only have space for 8 different transportation companies. So I put on the glasses, and, <bang!> it was like, “Of COURSE it’s like that…. You know, I should’ve gotten these a long time ago.”
The Daily Freier was then able to render assistance to several confused Dutch tourists. “I do not understand. We traveled from Ben Gurion and got out at Savidor because everyone said it’s the Central Train Station. But it isn’t actually central to ANYTHING! What the hell?” cried a confused and exhausted Esmee G. At this point the Daily Freier handed Esmee a pair of Google-Israel Glasses and she calmed down immediately and rallied her friends. “OK guys, let’s walk to our hotel on Hayarkon Street. It’s only 2 miles. Thank you Google Israel Glass!”
Not everyone was impressed with the glasses. Alert local Ronit S. disdainfully tried on the glasses. “OK big deal. Whatever. Nothing’s changed. What a rip-off…..Sorry, but I gotta go. I need to fax some documents to the Ministry of the Interior before they close at noon.”
Based on the early success of their “Israel Glasses”, Google plans a new version specifically for Haaretz subscribers called “The Amira” that make everything that one sees appear to be caused by “The Occupation” and basically all our fault.
The first copies of Google-Israel Glasses will be available at participating stores early next week, except for people who have gone on Birthright, who apparently for years have been issued them the moment they get off the plane.